


the beat between five and six

by tuanpark



Category: Stray Kids (Band)
Genre: Alternate Universe - High School, And Making Out lmao, Attempt at Humor, Banter, Enemies to Friends to Lovers, Enemies to Lovers, High School Musical References, Humor, Kim Seungmin is in Denial, Light Angst, M/M, Rated T for Trashmouth
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2019-12-25
Updated: 2019-12-25
Packaged: 2021-02-26 01:21:46
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 17,430
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/21945034
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/tuanpark/pseuds/tuanpark
Summary: “Ha ha ha,” Seungmin says dripping with sarcasm. “We all know I wouldn’t want to audition with Han Jisung even if we were the last two people on earth.”Or Seungmin missed his audition for the school play but so did his long-time rival and self-proclaimed arch-nemesis, Han Jisung. Good news for them, there's a make-up audition in three weeks' time. The catch? It has to be a duet piece.
Relationships: Han Jisung | Han/Kim Seungmin
Comments: 26
Kudos: 356
Collections: SKZ Secret Santa





	the beat between five and six

**Author's Note:**

  * For [thenationsrapper](https://archiveofourown.org/users/thenationsrapper/gifts).



> Hello @thenationsrapper ! I hope you enjoy this work. Hopefully the holidays are good to you.
> 
> As for everyone else, please give this work lots of love!
> 
> Happy Holidays!

It all happens because Seungmin is late for the first time ever in his high school career. 

Seungmin is the type to get things done to the highest performance quality, earlier than on-time and earlier than early. Kim Seungmin is never one to be late, except for today it seems. His ornate alarm clock, complete with the twin ringing bells in all its silver glory, had somehow ran out of battery overnight, and Seungmin woke up with only minutes before his first class. Seungmin prides himself in his medal-worthy perfect attendance and the altar of gold medals he’d won from academic competitions, scholastic awards, and performance events.

However, no amount of gold medals can turn back time and make Seungmin un-late for his first class. Seungmin sprints across the hallway in record time, holding tightly onto the straps of his backpack to keep it from bouncing too wildly. When he reaches the door to his Engish class, the door opens with a decisive slam that makes Seungmin and half the class wince in its loudness.

“Apologies, Mr. Tuan,” Seungmin bows and greets as he tries to catch his breath. “I woke up late and-”

“Save it,” the English teacher demanded, looking rather put off. Seungmin is usually not on good terms with the teacher, and the way Mr. Tuan is glaring at him a little too harshly, Seungmin thinks it would be best if he kept his mouth shut. “Detention, Kim Seungmin, for not only being late but for disrupting the class with your rather noisy and dramatic entrance.”

Seungmin’s eyes bulge out of their sockets. Detention? _Detention?_ Seungmin has never been in detention. What happens in detention? Do students in leather jackets throw spit wads at him using lunch straws? Will he get bullied for being a well-known goody-two-shoes amongst a crowd of trouble makers? Seungmin shivers just thinking about it.

“But sir, it’s my first time being late. Ever. Don’t you think detention is a little too harsh a punishment?”

“Is lifetime imprisonment a little too harsh a punishment for a first-time first-degree murderer?” Mr. Tuan challenges with a quirk of his brows. “Go to your seat, Mr. Kim.”

“Yessir,” Seungmin answers dejectedly.

Seungmin catches Jisung’s eyes from where’s he’s sat, and the older boy is laughing. Jisung sticks out his tongue and Seungmin gives him the middle finger.

He goes about his day the same way he usually does: listening intently during the lectures as he takes down notes on subjects he’s not sure he’ll use later on, answering questions that the teacher asks because the awkward silence becomes practically unbearable when nobody wants to say the answer out loud for fear of being wrong, and eating lunch alone on the table until his friends of three years in high school come and join him.

Seungmin focused on the fact that he was late and got detention so much that he completely forgets that today is a special day. Or at least, the end of the school day is. He was so immersed in his inability to get out of detention that he completely forgets an occasion too important to not remember, and this ends up being his downfall later on.

“How are you feeling?” Jeongin asks with a concerned look on his face as soon as the younger boy joins him on the lunch table.

“You already heard?” Seungmin sighs. “Not so good. It’s my first time getting it, and to be quite honest, I’m afraid of what’s going to happen. Aren’t there a lot of delinquents in detention? What if their bad mojo rubs off on me? What if their lack of talent in academics somehow latches onto me and refuses to let go? I’m terrified, Innie!”

“What the heck are you going on about?” Jeongin replies, looking at Seungmin with an adorable confused expression. Seungmin tilts his head.

“Well, I’m talking about getting detention after school today,” Seungmin answers slowly, trying to figure out where this is going. “Wait, what did you think I would be going on about?”

Jeongin’s shocked face catches Seungmin off-guard. “Today? You got detention _today_? That’s preposterous. In all the years I’ve known you, you’ve never gotten detention.”

“That’s what I’m talking about!”

“Does it have to be today? How are you taking it? What is Mr. Park going to say?”

“Yeah, it has to be today. Surprisingly, I’m not freaking out as much as I should. And what does Mr. Park have to-” Seungmin’s eyes bulge out. “Oh, fuck.”

The sudden realization of today’s date makes Seungmin’s fingers go numb. Today is audition day, and Mr. Park is an absolute stickler when it comes to rules, due date, and punctuality. Though he supposes he himself is very similar, and if Seungmin was in Mr. Park’s shoes, his personality would not allow him to verge on the forgiving side even if the person asking for an extension is one of his favorite students.

“Oh dear god,” Seungmin faces Jeongin in bewilderment. “What the heck do I do?”

“Maybe you can ask Mr. Park if you can audition a little later than everyone else,” Jeongin supplies.

“I know Mr. Park, and he is not going to let me audition on an extension. He likes rules, and he’ll see it unfair for those who had to audition earlier than I did, seeing as me auditioning at a later time could be misconstrued as extra practice time that others didn’t receive.”

“Even if you tell Mr. Park that you got detention?”

“Maybe,” Seungmin shrugs. “But what if he doesn’t? I need to think of something else. I can’t not be on the play. It’s my last year!”

“How about rescheduling your detention date?”

“And have Mr. Twat give me a mouthful? I don’t think so. He already dislikes me enough as it is. He thinks I’m an annoying know-it-all that refuses to let others get the spotlight.”

“Well…” Jeongin trails off.

If Seungmin wasn’t so rattled right now, he would shun Jeongin for this utter betrayal. But alas, there are more pressing matters at hand than Jeongin agreeing with stinky Mr. Tuan with his negative opinion of Seungmin.

“Sneak out of detention?” Jeongin adds.

“I- Well, maybe. Oh gods, let’s try all of them.”

When Hyunjin and Felix join them on the table, Seungmin immediately goes to both of them for some physical comfort. Felix always gives good cuddles and Hyunjin gives the best hugs. And also, he kind of wants to ask them for a favor, and since both Hyunjin and Felix are touchy people, he figures the best way to ask them is to get them to coddle him first.

However, it proves inefficient as they both tell him it’s a tall order even if his three friends work together.

“I don’t think we can extend the auditions for a whole hour, Seungmin,” Felix tells him softly as he cards his hand through Seungmin’s hair.

“Yeah,” Hyunjin agrees, head resting on Seungmin’s lap as he stares up at the younger boy. “Even if Felix, Jeongin, and I try to stall as much as possible, I don’t think we can do it for a whole hour.”

“Maybe fifteen minutes,” Jeongin adds. “Thirty at best. One whole hour seems very unlikely, but we’ll try our best.”

“Fine, fine, fine,” Seungmin sighs in defeat. “I’ll think of something else.”

He could not, in fact, think of anything else. And so it goes that Seungmin tries asking Mr. Tuan for a reschedule on his detention, to which his English teacher replies with, “Actions have consequences, Mr. Kim. Perhaps you should learn this lesson now than finding out about it later. I’m sorry to hear that you’ll be missing your audition, but I’m sure there’ll be another play to come around.”

Seungmin has a few colorful words to say to him, but all he ends up saying is “Okay, thank you, Mr. Tuan.” even if he did feel like calling him Mr. Twat.

When Seungmin enters the detention room, he had half a mind to sit in the back so that it would be easier to sneak off. However, one look at the burly dudes with scars and messy hair has Seungmin deciding otherwise. Perhaps the front seats aren’t all that bad.

Though Seungmin tries to use his charm on the detention leader, all of his efforts are to no avail.

“I’ve had my fair share of slippery students try to get their way out of detention, slick. Not happening on my watch.”

Seungmin sighs and returns to his seat, cursing the world for letting this happen to him. Curse this detention leader for not being understanding. Curse Mr. Twat for giving him detention. And curse his goddamn alarm clock for not working properly.

Detention ends with no spit wads on his hair, or whatever he thought would happen. If anything, it was uneventful with Seungmin spending most of his time trying to start on homework and figuring out how to best talk to Mr. Park for an audition.

As soon as the bell signals that detention is over, Seungmin races to the auditorium on the far side of campus. Just as he opens the door to the hallway, he sees Mr. Park locking the auditorium entrance accompanied by Mr. Twat with a funny look on his face.

“Mr. Park!” Seungmin calls as he quickly approaches. “Mr. Park, good afternoon! I’m sorry I’m late, but I was wondering if I could still audition. You see, my alarm clock didn’t work today due to my battery dying. And this made me late for my first class, and the teacher ended up giving me detention today of all days. If I could still audition today, I would greatly appreciate it.”

Mr. Park looks at him then at Mr. Tuan and back. “Ah, Mark did tell me. Your handsome English teacher here had so kindly informed me of your situation. And my, is it unfortunate.”

Mark? Is that Mr. Tuan’s first name? And did Mr. Park just call him.... handsome? Mr. Tuan suddenly faces the floor looking _shy_. What the heck is going on here?

“So does that mean you’ll let me audition?”

Mr. Park side-eyes Mr. Tuan before turning back to Seungmin. “Well, rules are still rules, Seungmin. You know how much I value our time and fairness when it comes to audition. But since Mark had told me how bright of a student you are, I figured we could do something that would give you as well as others who missed today’s auditions a chance at getting into the play.”

Seungmin’s eye twitches at the very fact that Mr. Park called Mr. Tuan Mark again. And did he just say that stinky Mr. Twat put in a good word for him? What in the world?

“Thank you, Mr. Park. You won’t regret it! I promise I won’t miss it this time!” Seungmin breathes out in relief, hand coming up to his chest. “So when are the next auditions?”

“In three week!” Mr. Park suggests with a smile. “I know I definitely won’t regret it, but I hope you won’t regret this either.”

Seungmin cocks his head to the side. “Why would I regret it?”

Mr. Tuan gives him a smirk. Mr. Park nods. “Well, the auditions in three weeks will be duet auditions! I think it’s a great way to assess chemistry and teamwork. I figured that it’s such a good idea that I’ll be doing this for the rest of my time here as director. You can thank lovely Mr. Tuan here for the wonderful idea!”

Seungmin gives them both a tight smile, hands itching to get at Mr. Twat.

“Yes. Lovely.”

*******

“Please, please, please,” Seungmin begs. “I don’t have anybody to audition with.”

Jeongin rolls his eyes. “Yes, you do. You’re just too lazy to look, and too content in staying inside your bubble of friends.”

“That’s not true,” Seungmin denies. It’s not. It’s just that Jeongin would be the best partner for him, he just knows it. They work well together. “Let me rephrase that then. I don’t have anybody _good_ to audition with.”

Jeongin sputters. “Well thanks for the compliment, but I already auditioned as a solo. I don’t think Mr. Park allows double auditions.”

Seungmin sighs in defeat. He supposes that’s true. “Damn rules.”

Jeongin gives him a reassuring smile. “If it makes you feel any better, I don’t think I saw Changbin or Jisung at the auditions.”

Seungmin narrows his eyes. Really? “Really?”

Jeongin laughs. “I didn’t see them, so there’s a chance that they haven’t auditioned yet. Perhaps you can ask them to pair up with you.”

“Ha ha ha,” Seungmin says dripping with sarcasm. “We all know I wouldn’t want to audition with Han Jisung even if we were the last two people on earth.”

Though he supposes it’s not the worst idea. If anything, maybe he can ask Changbin to do it.

Seungmin catches him just right at the beginning of lunchtime and asks him to be his duet partner for the audition. Changbin looks at him as if he’s grown two heads.

“I appreciate the fact that you deem me good enough to be your partner,” Changbin answers.

“Why do I hear a but coming?”

“But I’m not doing the play this semester actually. I wanted to focus on my music with a college friend of mine,” Changbin explains, fingers scratching his cheek before giving him a very disconcerting smile. “But I know someone who’s also looking for a partner. I think you two would make a great pair.”

“Alright, who?”

When Seungmin inquires Felix about it, his eyes light up like a Christmas tree.

“Han Jisung? He offered Han Jisung?”

Seungmin nods. “Preposterous, right? As if I would ever work with the likes of that pompous, elitist, irritating ass of a person.”

“Well, it doesn’t sound like a bad idea in my opinion. But have you asked any other people to audition with you?”

“I asked Changbin.”

“Ah, he’s not doing the play this semester right?” Seungmin nods in answer. “Did you ask anyone else?”

Seungmin feels sheepish. “I asked Shuhua.”

“And?”

“She suddenly pulled out her phone and made it look like it was buzzing, then proceeded to say that this was an important call and that she had to take it.”

Felix makes a pained face. And that’s not even the worst of it.

“Renjun nervously laughed at my face and said he thought I was joking and walked away even though he’s in my first class, so he must have seen me get detention. Yeji glared at me before I could even ask. Jisu said she was working with Jaemin. Funny though I asked Jaemin and he said he was working with Heejin. Bomin apparently auditioned already. And Chaewon said she’d be sick three weeks from now.”

Felix tries to hold back a snicker at the last one.

“Am I really that bad a person to working with?”

Felix bites his lips. “Well, as one of your best friends, I would just like to say that I am personally obliged to say that no you are not. Theoretically, if I _wasn’t_ your best friend, I would say that working with you kind of feels like ordering a large cup of bubble tea with tapioca pearls. Except there are no pearls. Or ice. Or sugar. Or tea. Just milk. And you’re lactose intolerant.”

“Now that’s just mean,” Seungmin huffs but understands. It’s not his fault he’s very meticulous about practice and methods of practicing. He just wants to show the best of what he has to offer. “Do you think nobody else would want to work with me for this audition?”

“I think… it’s high time you and Jisung put your weird, tension-filled history behind you and start working towards the same end goal. If I calculated correctly, this plan is sure to work,” Felix whispers excitedly as he puts an arm around Seungmin’s neck.

“Aren’t you bad at math?”

Felix ignores his snark and uses his free arm makes an animate rainbow above their heads. “Just think of what you two can achieve together.”

“Voluntary manslaughter?”

“World domination, my friend,” Felix grins. “What better way to tackle the auditions than with the best-”

“ _Second_ best.”

“-singer in the school. You two would harmonize perfectly with his belty, pitchy tone working alongside your stable melody.”

“I highly doubt that’s true,” Seungmin scoffs. “But I guess I have no other choice.”

It’s during lunchtime when it happens.

Seungmin gulps. In Seungmin world, he’s gone through most everything. He had dueled Lord Voldemort and won. He had traveled to Mordor and back without facing death. He had even won a survival game with twenty-three other competitors and had overthrown a government right after. But none of those had prepared him for facing his biggest foe by far, the strongest nemesis one could think of.

Han Jisung is by no means scary looking. In fact, he’s the opposite of such, what with his full cheeks, slender body, and about average height. But there’s something about the boy that Seungmin finds disconcerting. It’s not the rather large front teeth he has that makes him look like he’s from the marsupial family, nor is it his unusually large feet that makes him look like a waddling duckling. Instead, it’s Han Jisung’s sharp tongue and quick wit, both of which are a match for Seungmin’s, which makes him a little frightening.

There he goes now, walking alongside his child of a best friend who is similar in stature, albeit with a darker aura and pointier chin. They sit down at a table near the center of the cafeteria and set down their food. Seungmin takes a deep breath before walking towards Jisung and Changbin.

He eyes the two of them, how they talk in hands and whispers, wonders if anyone in the world can understand their language. Before Seungmin even gets too close though, Changbin makes eye contact with him and proceeds to nudge Jisung on the elbow. The younger boy looks up looking confused, and then his eyes go wide when they land on Seungmin. It goes away as quickly as it comes though, his face now a painting of nonchalance and forced indifference.

“Seungmin.”

“Jisung.”

“Mutt.”

“Rat.”

“What brings you to this side of the cafeteria?” Jisung asks coolly, leaning back a little bit and crossing his arms to imitate an intimidating posture. Seungmin wants to roll his eyes but knows he needs to be calm and collected for this, lest it all go to shit. He can’t jeopardize his chances at getting the male lead at the play, especially not now with his last year here. “I was wondering if we could talk in private?”

“Whatever you have to say, you can say in front of my dear best friend here,” Jisung smirks, eyes glinting with a little mischief. Changbin is also smiling suspiciously, and Seungmin bets his left nut that Changbin told Jisung about how Seungmin probably went running to him with his tail between his legs, begging him to be his partner for the duet auditions. Seungmin wonders if his pride can handle this embarrassment.

“Well, I think this subject concerns matters just between me and you.”

Jisung bites his lips. “Changbin can stay. I think you’d be hard-pressed to find any secrets between us. We even know the sizes of each other’s-”

“Okay, I got it!,” Seungmin interrupts, trying his best to get rid of the mental image of Jisung and Changbin comparing each other. “He can stay.”

“Calm down, I was only going to say shoes,” Jisung laughs, eyes crinkling in the way that symbolizes that he definitely was not talking about shoes. “What did you want to talk about?”

Seungmin looks at Jisung now, sees the arrogance basically oozing from his tiny little body. He can see the sharp tongue literally and figuratively sticking out right this moment. And with the way things are going now, maybe it’s best to stop before they even started. He doesn’t know if he can stand Jisung’s presence for more than 5 minutes, and he’s certain that they’ll need to practice much, much longer than 5 minutes. 

Just as he’s about to stand up though, Felix’s voice suddenly pops into his head. _World domination_ . It’s followed by his own words to Mr. Park. _I promise I won’t miss it this time!_ Seungmin sighs. He supposes he just has to grin and bear it. Last year, last chances. Last year, last chances.

“How would you like to have the chance of your lifetime?”

Surprisingly, it took little to no effort to have Jisung on board with the idea. Seungmin thinks that Changbin and their mutual friend Felix has something to do with this. Perhaps they already reasoned out the pros and cons with Jisung? In any case, convincing Jisung was much easier done than said, which is usually not the case. Maybe this won’t be a pain in the butt that Seungmin dreaded it to be.

They were civil enough to decide on which songs to do and add some choreography they ripped off of YouTube. You’re The One I Want from Grease would be a good song to showcase their ability to be the male lead, with both of them agreeing to take turns on singing Danny and Sandy’s parts. They also decided to include Greased Lightning so that, on the off-chance that Mr. Park decides not to cast either of them as Danny, the other could show that they can make a good enough back up male characters.

It’s during the actual working together part that breaks Seungmin’s hope that this wouldn’t be too much of a drag. It seems that their personalities are just simply made to be at odds with each other, with Seungmin nagging Jisung for every little thing and Jisung being way too nonchalant about the whole ordeal, so much so that it looks almost as if he doesn’t care about the whole audition.

It’s the thought of Jisung possibly sabotaging him that has Seungmin snapping.

“Well, why don’t you be more stable then?” Seungmin bites, his nerves getting the best of him.

“Well, why don’t you dance better then?”

“Maybe I would if I could focus on it, but all I can hear in my ears is your awful voice.”

Jisung releases a sharp gasp.

“My voice,” Jisung enunciates, offended hand placed on his chest. “Is _not_ awful.”

“Is too.” 

“Is not.”

“You’re a child,” Seungmin rolls his eyes.

“You started it,” Jisung barks back with a hmph.

“No, I didn’t?”

“Did too.”

Seungmin pinches the bridge of his nose. They’re never going to get anywhere if they keep acting like this.

“Maybe we should take a break,” Jisung suggests.

“Of course you would want to take a break,” Seungmin bites. “You’re probably going to want to take a lot of breaks because you don’t view practice serious enough to warrant the effort it needs.

“That’s not even close to why I want a break, but suit yourself.”

***

“And it’s so annoying,” Seungmin rants. “He thinks he’s so much better just because he can hit the high notes and has danced more than I have. I can hit the high notes too, and I’m more stable than he is anyway.”

Hyunjin, Felix, and Jeongin nod mindlessly, surely acquainted with this side of Seungmin that rants a lot about his long-time rival.

“Well, I’m gonna show him,” Seungmin says, chewing on his chicken nuggets quickly.

“You do that,” Jeongin encourages him, though his voice sounds almost robotic. “Show him who’s boss.”

“He doesn’t get to push me around like this,” Seungmin crosses his arm petulantly. He understands that he seems like a child right now, but there’s just something about Jisung’s annoying face that riles him up to no end.

“No, sir,” Felix adds, taking a sip of his drink. “He’s only done it like 5 years now.”

Seungmin hisses.

“Trust me,” Seungmin challenges. “I’m gonna practice so I can outshine him onstage during the duet auditions. Just you watch, he’s going to be eating dust when I’m through with audition day.”

“I’m sure he will be,” Hyunjin says. “How do you even practice if you’re in this constant state of irritability?”

“With finesse,” Seungmin scoffs. “Anyway, I’m gonna dance my butt off. Mr. Park is going to be so blown away that he’ll have no choice but to cast me as lead and Jisung as nobody.”

Everyone is quiet as Seungmin waits for a response.

“Jeongin, it’s your turn,” Felix reminds him.

“What?”

“What?”

“What?”

“Nothing,” Seungmin’s three friends say in unison. 

“Tell me more about how annoying Jisung is,” Jeongin steers the conversation back as he takes a bite of his lunch.

***

The next time Jisung and Seungmin practice, they can’t get their steps right.

“It’s because you’re a beat too early,” Jisung reasons out.

“No, it’s because you’re a beat too late,” Seungmin counters. “It’s obviously on count _five,_ that makes more sense.”

“No, it doesn’t. My natural sense of rhythm wants me to do it on count six.”

“Well your natural sense of rhythm is wrong.”

“Your whole existence is wrong.”

“You take that back,” Seungmin growls.

“Not before you take back what you said.”

“Even if I take it back doesn’t mean it’s not true,” Seungmin hisses.

Jisung scoffs. “You’re honestly the most difficult person to work with.”

Seungmin closes his eyes. “Look, how about we sit down for a bit and focus on our good and bad points. Let the bad blood out until after audition day. By then, we can go at each other like rabid dogs.”

“Fine by me,” Jisung answers with his hands up in the air.

When they settle down on the floor, distance much too wide for any semblance of affection, Seungmin starts the conversation.

“Let's begin first with the negatives. What do you think I should work on? Be harsh, but also be truthful. Don’t let your feelings for me blindly misguide your words.”

“Well, your dancing could be a little better,” Jisung strikes first. Seungmin grits his teeth, unsure just how honest Jisung is being.

“Would you care to expand?”

“You think too much about it,” Jisung shrugs. “Let it happen naturally. I like to visualize it in my mind, and that helps me do the moves without thinking of the little details.”

Seungmin nods.

“You’re not bad, per se. But I think you could put a bit more power and expression in your dancing, especially facials. Facials are part of performing.”

“I know that,” Seungmin cuts.

“Well, why don’t I see it?” Jisung bites back, and Seungmin holds himself back from decking Jisung then and there. “I think if you could incorporate those, you’d be really good.”

“Anything else you’d like to add?”

“Your singing can get a little nasally sometimes,” Jisung shrugs.

“Well, I can’t help that my natural voice is like that,” Seungmin rolls his eyes. “Is that all?”

“Maybe you can lay off on the nagging, yeah? I know that performing is a serious thing, but you should relax a little bit.”

“Whatever. Is that it?”

Jisung nods. “What about me? What should I work on?”

Seungmin finds it hard to find a fault in Jisung. He’s just that good, but Seungmin would first fail a class before he gives Jisung the satisfaction of knowing that he’s basically flawless.

“Your dancing could probably be the tiniest bit cleaner,” Seungmin points out. “I feel like you focus a lot on power and charisma, which takes away the clean lines necessary for dancing.”

“So the opposite of you,” Jisung adds.

“Basically.”

“Anything else?”

“Perhaps restrain yourself from forcing your voice?” Seungmin offers.

Jisung stares at him with narrowed eyes. “Go on.”

“Sometimes it sounds like you’re straining it, which could damage your throat later on if you keep singing like that. Though I suppose that would be good for me.”

“You’re a little bitch, you know that?”

Seungmin ignores him. “Also you need to know when to be serious. I get that there’s merit in having fun, but there’s also a time to be completely serious, and practice is one of those times.”

“I don’t think my attitude is the problem. I think you just don’t know how to have fun.”

“That’s not true,” Seungmin counters. “In any case, let's move onto the positives before we lose track of what we’re really trying to do here.”

“Fine. Hit me with compliments.”

“Well, your range is really good. You can usually hit high notes in a chest voice, which shows that you have solid technique other than the times I hear you strain your voice. You’re also very confident, which helps in making your singing sound better.”

“Ooh, tell me more.”

“You sound good, okay?”

“Is Kim Seungmin actually being nice to me?”

Seungmin gags. “Please, don’t get used to it. I’m biologically programmed to dislike you, so it physically pains me to say these things.”

“Well keep on going anyway.”

“You have a lot of charisma and energy in your dancing, which balances the slight lack of cleanliness and technique. You have great facial expressions too, so there’s that.”

“Is that you saying I’m good looking?” Jisung fishes.

“No, that’s me saying you have good facial expressions while dancing. Moving onto me. Tell me about me. What am I good at?”

“Nothing,” Jisung answers without missing a beat.

“I’m serious!”

“Honestly?” Jisung asks. Seungmin nods. “Everything.”

Seungmin laughs. “Now you’re just playing me like a fiddle. Be more specific.”

Jisung snickers. “Truthfully, I really like how you dance. You have a good balance of fluidity and texture. Your moves are really clean, and I like watching you dance. The only thing, like I said before, is the power and facial expressions.”

“So you’re saying I’m ugly?”

Jisung shakes his head. “I’m saying you need better facial expressions.”

“And what about my singing?”

“Well, you have incredible pitch and tone. Your singing sounds so effortless,” Jisung says without taking his eyes off of Seungmin. “It’s honestly really calming. I really like your voice.”

“Except for the nasally part, I assume?”

“I like that too. Gives it a little flavor and uniqueness, I suppose.”

And with the admission comes the uncomfortable quiet, one that usually settles when things get too awkward between two people who are neither friends nor enemies.

“Okay this is too weird for me. Can we start practicing again?” Seungmin suggests.

“I was getting weirded out. I thought you would never ask.”

***

The week goes by like that, with Seungmin and Jisung becoming more and more civil with each practice session. It goes so well, in fact, that his friends corner him about it.

“It’s been a whole week since you last ranted about Jisung. What’s up?” Felix asks during lunch.

“Maybe they figured that they couldn’t work together and have decided not to work as a duet anymore,” Jeongin pipes up.

Seungmin sighs. “Contrary to popular belief, we still are working together. We’ve just been more civil about it and have decided to not let our hatred of each other come out until after audition day.”

“I find that quite hard to believe,” Hyunjin counters. “You’re really going to contain your sharp mouth for three whole weeks?”

“I’ve been doing a good job, haven’t I?”

“We wouldn’t know. We don’t see you guys practice. For all we know, you two could be practicing separately,” Felix argues.

“That’d be stupid. We wouldn’t have any chemistry when we perform then, if that’s the case.”

“Well, I suppose the good thing is that our lives are finally quiet,” Hyunjin smiles.

“Are you saying my Jisung rants are loud and annoying?”

“That’s exactly what I’m-”

Hyunjin gets pinched before he even finishes his sentence.

***

It’s on a Thursday afternoon when Seungmin notices how much hard work Jisung actually puts into this whole thing. Thursdays are their days off, so Jisung shouldn’t even be in the studio. When Seungmin goes there to destress from all of the homework and duet performance practice, the lights are off. Just as he’s about to open the door, he hears the unmistakable sound of Jisung’s singing.

Seungmin would be the first to say that Jisung’s voice isn’t that good. But he’d also be the first to say that he’s lying. Jisung’s voice is incredible, able to hit the high notes with such ease that one would assume it was one of his favorite pastimes. Perhaps it’s something Seungmin still struggles with to this day, but Seungmin knows with enough practice, he could hit those notes as well. He should really log that into his practice notebook.

Jisung’s voice is a mixture of breathy, nasal, and a little bit honeyed. To be quite honest, it’s a very soothing sound, but no way is he telling Jisung that. When Seungmin peeks inside, he sees the undeniable silhouette of Jisung dancing in the studio. Except there’s something peculiar in the way he moves. While he still dances fluidly and with the same amount of passion as he usually does, Seungmin can tell that there’s something up with his left ankle. Seungmin sees it in the way Jisung slows down a bit when he has to put too much weight on it. Jisung also stretches it every ten or so seconds, and Seungmin wonders why he hadn't noticed before. Perhaps Jisung was hesitant to show that he had any weaknesses?

The thought of it, of Jisung hiding something from Seungmin, bothers him greatly. He can’t place an exact feeling or description of this emotion churning in his stomach, but he supposes he can blame the fact that withholding this type of information could really hinder their performance if Jisung somehow gets too injured to perform on duet day.

That seems like a logical enough reason.

Seungmin doesn’t know how long he keeps watching Jisung do his spins and turns, doesn’t realize how many minutes he’s spent listening to Jisung’s silvery singing voice. Maybe there’s a part of him that enjoys seeing Jisung work his butt off in pain. Yet that doesn’t quite seem like the right feeling. When he figured that standing there was becoming much too stalkerish, Seungmin opens the door and enters the studio.

Immediately, Jisung stops and turns around, looking confused as to why Seungmin is suddenly in the studio when they weren’t supposed to meet today.

“I thought you don’t have to be here on Thursdays?” Jisung asks, taking out an earbud. “I wasn’t expecting you.”

“You’re practicing,” Seungmin shrugs. “Shouldn’t that mean I should also be practicing?”

“I suppose.”

They do so for ten minutes, with Jisung and Seungmin harmonizing with each other as they dance gracefully. It’s only less than a week until the big day, and Seungmin figures they’ve done very well considering all the trepidations they’ve had to get over.

As expected, Jisung doesn’t show how much his ankle hurts, even when Seungmin can tell that something’s up considering the way Jisung’s breath and singing hitches whenever they put too much pressure on their ankles.

“I think we should stop for a bit,” Seungmin says, going over to his backpack and sitting down.

“But we just started,” Jisung furrows his brows.

“Just come here, you idiot,” Seungmin calls as he ruffles inside his backpack. “I’m onto you.”

Jisung obeys and approaches him, taking a seat right next to Seungmin as he looks over the younger’s shoulder. Seungmin pulls out a water bottle and hands it to Jisung. The older boy looks at him, bewildered.

“Drink water,” Seungmin commands. Jisung doesn’t do anything for a few seconds. And then it gets too stifling even for him, it seems, seeing as he takes the offered bottle and mumbles a small thanks.

“And rest your ankle, for fuck’s sake,” Seungmin snaps as Jisung takes a couple of gulps. “You’re not as slick as you think you are.”

Jisung blinks at him after drinking and gives him a nervous-looking smile before his lips turn into another one of his trademark smirks.

“Awh, sunshine. Is this your weird way of showing you care about my well-being?”

Seungmin's eyes widen at the nickname. Jisung hasn't ever called him that before. To be frank, Seungmin's not a big fan of it.

“No, dipshit. Don’t misunderstand,” Seungmin rolls his eyes. “This is me making sure my partner is in tip-top condition so he doesn’t drag me down during auditions.”

“You’re slowly falling for me aren’t you?” Jisung comments with a devilish look on his face. “I don’t blame you. Who could resist my handsome face?”

Seungmin makes a retching noise. “First of all, gross. Please don't call me sunshine. Second, there's no way I’m falling for your greasy ass. I’m gonna have to drop out of school before that happens. And third, I’m not trying to focus on feelings on my last year here. Feelings make us do stupid things, and I’m not about that.”

“If you say so,” Jisung grins, and Seungmin finds it hard to swallow because it kind of feels like they’re in on some secret together, like there’s a thread of something that’s shared only between the two of them. Kind of. And it feels funny and good and nerve-wracking at the same time.

The next day, Jisung asks Seungmin if he wants to ride home together. Seeing as Seungmin doesn’t have any reason to refuse him, they ride the platform together. It’s not uncomfortable. It’s anything but.

They make small talk, but both of them realize that common pleasantries don’t really suit them anymore. They’re at a point in their friendship where it’s unnecessary to talk about the weather or how it’s going.

When they sit down on the empty seat, Jisung offers him an earbud. Except it’s all tangled and just looking at how it’s sewn in and out of the knots really grates Seungmin. Seungmin takes it and undoes it for him slowly, struggling to do so with how horribly tangled it is.

“What did you do to this?”

Jisung tries to take the tangled mess back but Seungmin slaps his hands away.

“What are you doing?” Jisung inquires. “Double knotted earbuds are my trademark.”

Seungmin scoffs. “You mean you’re too lazy to untangle the wires so you go through life not caring about it.”

“Same difference.”

After that, there’s a silent understanding that they should put their differences aside just so they can go through this smoothly. It works well until Seungmin notices something.

Jeongin is the first person he thinks to talk to when he feels the slight shift in Seungmin and Jisung’s relationship.

“I think Jisung is kind of cool,” Seungmin starts as he presses his palms against the warm cup of coffee in front of him.

“That’s good,” Jeongin says, taking a bite of his cake. “What’s the problem here?”

“What do you mean what’s the problem? That’s exactly the problem,” Seungmin huffs. “I think he’s cool. But I don’t want to think he’s cool. And I don’t want him to know I think he’s cool, or else his big head would get even bigger.”

“You’ve been practicing a lot lately,” Jeongin reasons out. “It only makes sense that you two would start to get along.”

“That’s not how arch-nemesis works, Innie. I’m not supposed to just start traipsing around a sunflower field with my long-time rival out of nowhere.”

Jeongin sighs, setting down his fork. “Maybe you didn’t really view him as your rival. Maybe you just admired his obvious talent in singing and dancing and felt a little threatened by it, and so you used this facade of hating him as a way to cover up your true inner feelings, which is full of appreciation and respect. It allowed you to recognize his talents without showing an inch of weakness.”

What the fuck? Is that really what happened? Seungmin turns that over and over in his head. While true, Jisung does deserve praise for his terrific singing voice and dancing, but that doesn’t mean that Seungmin’s inner feelings was void of the dislike that he was certain he felt from the very beginning of their competitive streak.

“No, no, no, I don’t think that’s it,” Seungmin says, even though his retort sounds weak.

“You don’t despise him, obviously.”

“You don’t know that,” Seungmin challenges.

“Maybe you secretly like him, have you thought of that?”

“Jesus, no,” Seungmin shudders. Jeongin doesn’t comment on the fact that there was a small pause before Seungmin replied. “That’s definitely not it. Gosh, you’re no help.”

“You’re the one who asked,” Jeongin shrugs and there’s a small smile playing on his lips like he knows something that Seungmin doesn’t. “I’m just voicing out my thoughts on your situation.”

“Well, if you’re going to go on about me liking Jisung, then please keep it to yourself. I would rather not barf out the coffee I’m drinking, thank you very much.”

“Suit yourself,” Jeongin replies, taking another forkful of cake.

It was then Seungmin started overthinking everything and noticing things that he really didn’t need to. That was the start of Seungmin thinking about the possibility of actually having feelings for his rival.

The first time Seungmin notices it is during lunch when he watches Jisung. On the other side of the cafeteria, Jisung is in line with Changbin to get some food while Seungmin is already seated with Hyunjin and Felix and his own lunch.

When Jisung stretches and a sliver of his skin shows, Seungmin finds his eyes captivated by the paleness that contrasts Jisung’s dark clothes.

Immediately, he feels himself flush for being so unabashed by his carnal intentions. So perhaps Seungmin has always thought that Jisung was good looking, above-average visuals to say the least. His small face and soft features strike an attraction in Seungmin that he hasn’t accepted even now. Maybe Seungmin has a soft spot for big eyes and expressive faces and cute lips, but Jisung doesn’t need to know that.

If anything, nobody needs to know that. Not even Seungmin, which is why he tells himself that it’s nothing. He doesn’t feel any attraction towards Jisung because that would be dumb. And he definitely doesn’t have any _feelings_ for the older boy because that would be even dumber. One doesn’t just develop crushes over a couple of weeks of steady practice and alone time, especially when their partner is that person’s long-time rival.

This is Jisung for goodness’ sake. This is the same boy that Seungmin has always disliked ever since they became too competitive for their own good. This is the same boy that Seungmin found annoying with his animated personality and over the top antics. At least, this is what Seungmin tells himself.

That way, he can keep watching Jisung from across the room without feeling too guilty about it.

The next time it happens, it’s during a rather rare occasion in class when Seungmin finds himself zoning out of the lecture and into the depths of his own mind.

His brain turns over the unusual happenings of the last couple of weeks, starting with the day he was late for class. Goodness, he’s never late for class. And the fact that it happened during auditions day is so unfortunate. Perhaps this is fate’s way of trying to push him towards a path he’s never considered before.

Jeongin’s voice comes up in his head. _Maybe you secretly like him, have you thought of that?_

But as soon as he even thinks about it, he pushes on. No, he doesn’t like Jisung like that. He’s nice as a friend, but romantic feelings? That’s a different level of emotion that Seungmin isn’t quite ready to give to Jisung.

The time after that is between classes, when Jisung says hi to him in the hallway in public. Seungmin had waved back and felt tingly at the fact that they interacted somewhere other than the cramped space of a dance studio.

It was sort of a thing after that, where Jisung and Seungmin would slowly start making some sort of social contact outside of practice time, and Seungmin feels good about it. Why he feels good about it, he thinks he knows but doesn’t want to explain. It’s on the tip of his tongue, but Seungmin would rather bite it before it leaves his mouth.

It’s when Jisung gets close during the partner work that Seungmin gets a little rattled by his own reaction. Or rather, when Jisung doesn’t step close enough.

“Get closer, Jisung,” Seungmin huffs, taking Jisung’s hands and placing them on his hips. His own sentence catches him off-guard, and from the looks of it, Jisung as well. He hasn’t ever said those words out loud. If anything, he’s said the opposite more times than he can count.

There’s this innate want to observe Jisung as much as he can from afar. And while that sounds similar to what he’s done in the past, this time he wants to do it to find out more about Jisung rather than to search for something negative.

Not only that, he also feels calmer, better, when Jisung is physically close. And he doesn’t quite know what to do with that information.

“Mr. Park is not going to care about our little lack of chemistry in real life. But onstage, he expects us to perform to our best abilities, and that means that we have to make it look like we’re really good friends whether we are or not. So please, just leave your hands on my goddamn waist.”

Jisung swallows before smirking at Seungmin. “Never thought I’d hear you command me to touch you like that, but it’d be my pleasure.”

Seungmin scoffs as they start their dancing again. “You’re incorrigible. I don’t know why I put up with your bullshit.”

Though he says that, Seungmin thinks he knows exactly why he puts up with it. It’s the same part of himself that says Jisung isn’t at all annoying or unfunny or unattractive, however much he voices it so.

This whirlwind of confusion and emotion makes performance day come faster than Seungmin expected it. Before he knows it, he’s on deck for the audition with Jisung vibrating with nervous energy by his side.

“We’re going to do great,” Jisung starts.

“We’re going to do great.” Seungmin repeats.

“We’ve practiced this a million times.”

“A million!” He emphasizes with his hands.

“And we’re gonna blow Mr. Park’s socks off.”

“Yes we are!”

Jisung nods, looking at Seungmin with stars in his eyes.

“Tomorrow, I guess we have to start hating each other again,” Seungmin offers, hands going behind his back and looking uncomfortable at the sentence.

Jisung also doesn’t seem to take too kindly at what Seungmin just mentioned seeing as he too visibly became uncomfortable after Seungmin says it.

“Is that what you want?” Jisung asks, eyes searching Seungmin’s for an answer that isn’t there.

“Isn’t that what you want?”

Jisung shrugs. Seungmin rubs the back of his neck, feeling stupid for even bringing up that stupid notion of rivals and nemesis and whatever.

“In any case, we should focus on our performance now. Let's do our best and show just how good the school’s two best singers are onstage.”

They do last-minute vocal and physical exercises, with Seungmin practicing his high and low tones and Jisung doing the same. They stretch their legs and arms quickly, reminding each other little details like Jisung keeping his hands firmly on Seungmin’s waist, and Seungmin and Jisung going on the _and_ count between five and six, and Seungmin not doing that damn jazz square.

When Mr. Park calls them up, Seungmin and Jisung exchange glances. _Let’s knock it out of the park._

“So what do you have for me today?” Mr. Park asks, hands clasped in front of him in genuine interest.

“Well, we’re going to sing You’re The One I Want and Greased Lightning,” Seungmin introduces confidently. “We wanted to show you the extent of our abilities.”

“So naturally, we added practiced choreography to go with the singing,” Jisung continues. “We hope you enjoy our piece.”

The both of them bow before facing each other and smiling nervously at each other. Seungmin motions a thumbs up, and the beginning beats of Greased Lightning start. Immediately, Seungmin’s body listens to the music. They’ve practiced this way too many times for his body not to remember.

“This car could be systematic,” Jisung starts.

“Hydromatic,” Seungmin goes.

“Ultramatic,” they say in unison, doing the steps they choreographed for this. “Why couldn’t it be Greased Lightnin’?!”

And then they’re both dancing to the beats as well as taking turns singing the song at the same time. Right this moment, Seungmin doesn’t keep his eye off of Jisung, watches him perform the same time he performs himself so that he could think quickly if Jisung somehow makes a mistake. Though his dancing is good, he’s not the best at retaining the steps.

The lights are harsh on Jisung, but he still looks pretty with his big smile and wide eyes as they sing the upbeat song. Seeing his expressions reminds Seungmin to keep his smile intact as well, and show the charisma that Jisung said he should work on.

They also manage to hit the movement on the _and_ count between five and six. Doing so makes Seungmin grin. And sooner or later, the song is finishing and they’re already slowing down to their _Lightning_ pose that signifies the end.

By the end, they’re beaming, their energy playing off of each other the way conversations do. And then the beginning beats of You’re The One I Want plays on the speaker.

And quickly, Jisung begins to sing the first few lines all while moving his body to the beat. Seungmin can’t keep his eyes off of him at all.

“You better shape up,” Seungmin sings his first line, dancing away with Jisung following him. “‘Cause I need a man.”

And then Seungmin is turning around, placing his hand on Jisung’s shoulder as he walks them backwards with purpose. Their dance is scarily synchronized, Seungmin is sure of it. But he can’t be bothered to check because all he has eyes on right now is the dark, hungry look on Jisung’s face. 

Seungmin almost visibly shivers. Jisung is truly something else when he’s performing. They try their best to add the sexual tension that Sandy and Danny were filled with. After the first chorus, Seungmin and Jisung switch roles.

And Seungmin ends up biting his lips when Jisung belts out “I need a man who can keep me satisfied.”

Later on, during the next chorus, when they sing the titular line, Seungmin puts both his hands on Jisung’s shoulders and Jisung keeps his hands firm on Seungmin’s waist. They shimmy together as they sing the lines _you’re the one that I want_. It’s heavenly, the way Jisung’s body is so warm and flush against Seungmin’s.

They, of course, had to add the iconic choreography of the hands-in-pocket move.

And then they’re singing and having fun onstage, Seungmin’s smile so big that it starts to hurt holding it like that. He doesn’t remember when he’s had this much fun performing, but he’s glad that it’s with Jisung. He’s having such a good time that he doesn’t even realize they’re at the tail end of the performance.

Seungmin doesn’t follow Jisung’s advice though squeezes in a jazz square in there.

And then the song is ending, and Seungmin’s heart is beating a little too quickly for his liking. Performing really gets him on a high. Their ending pose is the iconic part where Danny picks up Sandy with her legs bracketing him, except it’s Seungmin who picks Jisung up because even though Jisung is older, he’s also easier to carry since Seungmin is a few centimeters taller.

Mr. Park and the few auditionees clap, and Seungmin and Jisung bow in ecstasy.

When they get to their seat, Seungmin lets out a deep sigh.

“That was so good! We did so well,” Seungmin says, catching his breath.

“You think so?”

“I know so. Didn’t you see Mr. Park’s face?” Seungmin asks, smiling too widely.

“No, I was too busy watching you,” Jisung replies. The way Jisung says it, unabashedly and in a matter-of-fact way has Seungmin feeling tingly all over.

The end of audition day is anticlimactic, with Mr. Park thanking them for their performances, telling them how much he liked each piece, and dismissing them, telling the students to have fun on a Friday night and that the cast list will be out in a few days during lunchtime. And that it’ll be a paper pinned on the bulletin board just right outside.

When Seungmin and Jisung step out, they bid each other goodbye.

“I guess I’ll see you on Monday then?” Jisung says, scratching his cheek while smiling.

“Yeah, I guess so,” Seungmin agrees.

“Unless, you don't have something to do today? We can go out and celebrate or something.”

Seungmin coughs. “Oh, actually, my friends and I were thinking of having a celebration ourselves.”

“Ah, for sure,” Jisung nods, his smile dimming a little. “In that case, I wouldn’t want to hold you back. See you next time!”

Seungmin nods. “Yes, see you.”

***

Apparently, celebration means going to a college DJ party and getting shitfaced.

Seungmin and Hyunjin are dragged by Felix to go to a bar set up by students of Yonsei University, one of the main setters being his cousin from Australia. They apparently invited a very famous DJ and are going to party it up until the sun rises (or until everybody gets too sick to dance, whichever happens first).

Jeongin, under the Korean drinking age, was not allowed to go. No matter what fight the youngster put up, Felix was adamant that his cousin could get in trouble for letting someone who wasn’t of Korean drinking age inside the bar. Jeongin pouted for minutes on end, but Felix had to put his foot down, even if his heart melted at the sight of Jeongin’s puppy eyes.

And that’s how Seungmin finds himself sitting at a bar with Hyunjin and Felix, drinking the copious amount of Soju that Chan had poured for them. He’s on the fifth shot when he sees something peculiar, or rather someone, at the corner of his eyes.

Han Jisung is at the far side of the island, hanging off an annoyed-looking Changbin. Now what would they be doing here?

Feeling unusually courageous about his complicated friendship with Jisung, Seungmin huffs and struts towards the older boy.

Seungmin looks at the two of them, notices how they communicate in hands and whispers, wonders if Seungmin can understand their language. Before Seungmin gets too close, Changbin makes eye contact with him and nudges Jisung on the elbow. It reminds Seungmin of how he asked Jisung to be his partner three weeks ago, and all of a sudden it’s a little bit harder to breathe. Has it only been three weeks? It feels like he’s known Jisung for a lot longer than that.

The younger boy looks up puzzled, and then his eyes widen when they catch Seungmin’s. Seungmin smiles at him and Jisung smiles back. Just as he’s of earshot, Changbin gives him a wave hello.

“And that’s my cue to leave,” Changbin says and winks at Seungmin. “Don’t drink too much now, kids.”

Seungmin furrows his brows and Jisung laughs nervously. “Don’t mind him, please. He’s a weirdo.”

“Not surprised that he’s your best friend.”

“Is that jab at me? Or a jab at Changbin?”

“It’s a jab at both,” Seungmin snickers.

“You know, you’re much funnier than I thought you were,” Jisung admits, swirling the soju in his hands in an attractive manner.

“And you’re not half as funny as I thought you were,” Seungmin counters. Jisung scoffs, holding his chest in mock shock before lightly punching Seungmin’s shoulder. “Joking. You’re plenty funny.”

“Handsome too. Don’t forget handsome.”

“Let’s not push it, yeah?”

Seungmin snickers as Jisung shakes his head. “Gosh, you’re so annoying. When are you going to finally admit that you have the hots for me?”

Seungmin chokes but tries to hide it under the guise of a series of coughs. “That’s hilarious. You’re getting too ahead of yourself if you think that I have the hots for you. Sorry, but I don’t like you like that.”

It sounds weak, even to his ears.

“Come on, sunshine,” Jisung tries as he takes a couple of gulps of soju before cornering Seungmin against the counter of the bar. “Don’t you think it’s high time you’ve been honest with me?”

Seungmin gulps, eyes flickering down to Jisung’s lips on their own accord.

“I-I…” Seungmin licks his lips. He doesn’t miss the way Jisung’s eyes glance at the action, and Seungmin feels a little satisfaction at the flush currently building up on Jisung face. “I think you’re-”

“Sungie?” Jisung turns around quickly at the call. Behind him is a very pale, very pretty male who looks to be a couple of years older than them. His hair is a dark chestnut, split dramatically in the middle. He sports big eyes, a perfectly shaped nose, and pink, curvy lips that looks as sweet as it does soft. To be quite frank, he’s one of the most beautiful human beings Seungmin has seen to date.

“Minho?!”

Seungmin takes note of Jisung’s shift in personality, eyes crinkling deeper and smile forming bigger. Jisung also seems more open with his body language, and arms initiating a hug that the newcomer accepts much too happily. The smile on this new guy is far too wide, and Seungmin finds that he already doesn’t like this Minho person. Their embrace last for three seconds too long, and Seungmin almost makes a coughing noise to alert them that there’s another person here but finds that that’s a pretty rude and selfish move even for someone as thick-faced as Seungmin.

“Minho, this is my- uh, my audition partner Seungmin who I like to call sunshine. Seungmin, this is Minho,” Jisung gestures at the pretty boy right next to him. Minho looks him up and down as if assessing his desirability, and Seungmin feels a little under the microscope being at the receiving end of that intense stare. “He’s a childhood friend that I haven’t talked to in so long. What are you doing here?”

Minho giggles, eyes sparkling and all. And Seungmin sort of feels a little out of his element here. “I go to Yonsei of course. What are you doing here? Shouldn’t you still be in your last year of high school?”

“Technically, yes, but a friend invited us to come here seeing as the event organizers invited a rather famous DJ to play here on campus. DJ Wang, if I’m not mistaken. You might know my friend, actually. His name is Bang Chan.”

At this information, Seungmin perks up. Jisung knows Bang Chan?

“You know Bang Chan?” Minho asks before Seungmin gets the chance. And Seungmin dislikes the fact that Jisung starts to become more attentive towards the Minho guy. He realizes he doesn't like this feeling of being a third-wheel at all. He makes a decision to leave now, lest he accidentally hurt Minho or Jisung with his words.

“Jisung, I actually see my friends over there at the corner,” Seungmin points at a random direction. Jisung looks puzzled for a second as if the thought of Seungmin leaving his side didn’t even cross his mind. “If you’ll, uh, excuse me. I’ll talk to you later.”

“Wait, Seungmin. Let’s finish this conversation soon, okay?” Jisung tries, looking expectant. And Seungmin doesn’t say anything, just nods. If Jisung flinches, Seungmin tells himself that that’s not his problem.

Seungmin turns around and elbows his way towards a random direction. The last thing he hears coming from the pair of childhood friends is Minho’s aggravating voice saying “What’s _his_ deal?”

Seungmin ignores it and answers in his mind instead. There’s a lot, and his biggest problem right now is currently talking to a certain Han Jisung. God, Seungmin needs a drink.

He makes a beeline for the counter that decidedly doesn’t have Bang Chan in fear of Jisung and Minho making their way over there to say hi. That would surely be awkward. He surveys the area for his friends. Luckily, he finds Hyunjin dancing in the middle of the dance floor having what seems to be the time of his life. Seungmin figures this is the type of thing that Hyunjin would like, being surrounded by strangers who share a common interest of drinking alcohol and dancing the night away. There’s also a good number of stories that can be found in a large group of people, and Seungmin bets Hyunjin is already talking to a few strangers about their life stories.

Sure enough, when Seungmin joins Hyunjin, he’s bopping along to the music in a circle of people that look a couple of years older than both of them.

“Hyunjinnie,” Seungmin says in greeting. “How’s your night going?”

Hyunjin turns to him with a smile that slowly disappears upon setting his eyes on his younger friend.

“Seungmin? What happened? Are you okay?”

Seungmin does a double-take. There’s no way Hyunjin can tell that Seungmin isn’t currently feeling his best, right?

“Of course I am, why would you think I wasn’t?”

“Your face,” Hyunjin answers, hands going to hold Seungmin on both cheeks. “You look too sad to be our Seungmin.”

Is Seungmin really that easy to read? Hyunjin turns back to his circle of new friends and apologizes. “I’ll talk to you guys later. I have some pressing matters to attend.”

And with that, Hyunjin leads them both to the part of the counter that’s secluded enough for both of them to have a talk without being too public nor private.

“Now tell me what’s wrong,” Hyunjin says as soon as they settle down. “Do you not like the vibe here? Is the alcohol getting to you? I can go grab Felix and we can skedaddle if you want to.”

Seungmin shakes his head. “No, no it’s none of that. I think I’m just coming to a realization that’s been niggling in the back of my head for days now. And I’m not quite sure how to deal with it. Can we please just have some more to drink?”

“I’m not sure that’s the best idea,” Hyunjin comments worriedly. “Maybe a nice glass of cold water?”

“Alcohol,” Seungmin replies, defiant. “Please.”

Hyunjin sighs and orders for another bottle of soju to share between the two of them.

Seungmin doesn’t share much, just says that he thinks he likes someone that he shouldn’t like. And there’s this other person and they’re hot and Seungmin definitely cannot even compare to him, so it’s best if he just gives up now because it’s obvious the person he likes is going to choose the other one.

Hyunjin doesn’t ask too many questions, just listens intently and tries to calm Seungmin down through it all. By the end of the talk, Seungmin sort of forgets where he’s at. The room is spinning a little too much for his brain to handle, and there’s swirling in his stomach that has nothing to do with Jisung and Minho and everything to do with the alcohol he consumed in the past couple of hours.

“Well, whoever this is, don’t you think it’s worth it to fight for them? If I were you, I’d march my butt to my crush right now and kiss them then and there.”

“You don’t have the guts,” Seungmin teases.

“You’re right, I don’t. But if I did, that’s similar to something that I would do. If there’s a possibility of your crush being your person, are you literally just going to sit here and let this chance pass you by?”

Seungmin bites his lips. His friend is right. Good things don’t come to those who aren’t brave enough to go for it. Fortune bolds the favor, or something like that.

He hugs Hyunjin and tells him how good of a friend he is for always listening to him and dealing with his bullshit. Hyunjin just giggles.

“What are friends for?”

Seungmin pulls back and examines his friend’s face. He really is super pretty. Perhaps in another lifetime, a different dimension, Seungmin could have had feelings for Hyunjin instead of Jisung, but alas. Just as he thinks this though, his eyes catch Minho and Jisung talking to a flustered looking Bang Chan. And as Seungmin is about to go over there and steel himself to fight for Jisung, Minho leans in and gives Jisung a kiss on the cheek.

It seems that seeing someone else kiss his possible crush on the cheek is Seungmin’s boiling point. With a huff, Seungmin takes the bottle of soju and tries his best to empty the remaining amount of alcohol in there and fails. This doesn’t seem to be a good idea though, as the twisting feeling in his stomach gets even worse. Any minute now, Seungmin is sure to barf. 

He finds a bathroom quickly. Swinging the door open, Seungmin enters one of the stalls and immediately goes on his knees to wait for the onslaught of vomit and alcohol spewing out of his mouth.

Fuck his life. If someone told Seungmin that he’d be in a college party at Yonsei University, kneeling against the toilet of the men’s bathroom waiting for the barf to come up his throat, he’d say they were insane. Stupid Jisung. He hates the fact that he feels so helpless right now. His jeans must be overcome with germs now, and Seungmin doesn’t want to think too much about it, lest his slight germophobia get the better of him.

Stupid Jisung with his stupid cheeks. Darn him to hell. As well as Minho for giving Jisung cheek kisses and smushing himself right next to him. Seungmin thinks he wants to give Jisung cheek kisses. He bets his full cheeks would feel so nice and fluffy against Seungmin’s lips. 

Seungmin feels himself shiver and curses the fact that he can’t give Jisung cheek kisses right now, regardless of however much he wants to. Jisung could do so much better than that Minho guy anyway. His alcohol-infused mind suggests that the validity of this statement is rather questionable, but Seungmin digresses.

What does that guy even have that Seungmin doesn’t? Nice thighs? Seungmin’s got thighs, albeit not as thick or as muscular looking. A pretty face? Seungmin’s pretty! His mother says so all the time. Brains? Seungmin is positive he can calculate derivatives much faster than the porcelain-looking, starry-eyed, red-lipped, doll-wannabe looking ass.

Seungmin takes a swig of the bottle of soju that he has miraculously held onto up to this point. He wonders how it hasn’t broken yet with how much Seungmin is swaying side to side. It’s inexplicable how he hasn’t accidentally let go of it yet, considering Seungmin can’t even hold onto cute boys.

Just thinking about cute boys makes Seungmin want to barf, so he sits down on the closed toilet bowl to ease his mind and body. 

So perhaps, Seungmin has lied about not liking Jisung. Oh goodness, Seungmin can’t believe he finally admitted it to himself. He likes Jisung. He has feelings for Jisung. Who wouldn’t have feelings for him?

Though Seungmin initially thought Jisung was full of himself, Seungmin soon realizes that it’s all a facade. While Jisung is not necessarily insecure, he’s not quite the confident person he tries to portray himself as. Seungmin can tell with how starved he is for compliments. But beyond that, Seungmin likes how much effort Jisung has put into their duet performance. Seungmin saw firsthand the type of drilling and practicing that Jisung did in preparation for the auditions, and finds that it’s both admirable and inspirational at the same time.

Jisung is also incredibly kind, loyal almost to a fault. And he’s funny, just like he says he is. And handsome, just like he says he is. And has a full, vibrant energy that Seungmin feels a little colder and a little less warm without.

And the talent he possesses. Seungmin almost feels envious. Almost. Anyone with eyes and ears can tell that Jisung is 169 cm of pure, beautiful talent. So yes, Seungmin ended up liking Jisung. Yes, Seungmin has the hots for him, just as Jisung had teased him. Looking back now, he wonders if he could have prevented this if he just told Jisung the truth and agreed that _yes, yes, Jisung, I have the hots for you._

He doesn’t get to think anymore because at that moment, his stomach hurls out all the contents it consumed in the last couple of hours. All he can focus on is the choking pain that comes along with barfing, the bitter taste of acid dirtying his mouth, and the rancid smell of vomit and alcohol mixing grossly together.

Seungmin feels a pair of arms pull him up, but his eyes are too unfocused and too tired to care. The touch is light and familiar, the voice even more so: a satisfying mixture of breathy and nasal. Add that to the scent he’s been familiar with the last week, he knows for certain that he’s in good hands.

*******

When Seungmin wakes up in his mind, he immediately feels disoriented.

Instantly, he can tell that the mattress he’s sleeping on isn’t his. His bed is firm and nice, very different from the softness that seems to be swallowing him deep right now. The pillow also has a scent that Seungmin has definitely smelled before but can’t quite pinpoint, a relaxing aroma that Seungmin associates both with good feelings and slight disgust.

When he opens his eyes, the brightness of the day threatens to blind him. The walls are stark white, but they’re littered with posters that Seungmin doesn’t have in his own room. He sees various artists and games displayed on the posters, ranging from k-pop groups and alternative rock bands to anime shows that he thinks he’s seen his friend Felix watch before.

He considered being in Felix’s room. He wouldn’t put it past the Aussie to be kind enough to take him to his place after Seungmin got too trashed at the celebratory party. However, Seungmin has been inside Felix’s room enough to know that the size of Felix’s room is much, much bigger than the room he’s currently in. There’s a desk on the corner, complete with a rolling swivel chair that is stacked with possibly used clothes. The hamper on the other side is nearly overflowing with dirty ones, and there’s a stray sock or two decorating the carpeted floor.

He’s surprisingly very calm about not knowing where he is. Usually, he’d freak, but there’s a small part of him that innately knows he’s in good hands now just as he was in good hands last night. However, all of that feeling of safety goes away as soon as he hears the loud screech of the fire alarm followed by the alarming smell of something burning.

Without a second thought, Seungmin untangles the blankets he’s wrapped in and jumps out of the bed. His body feels a little unhinged, knees shaking from having no weight to supporting his full weight in a matter of seconds. There’s a pounding on his head that makes him see white for a second, and Seungmin fights the urge to simply roll over and fall to the ground. After the feeling passes, Seungmin grabs the first sweatpants and hoodie that he gets his hands on and goes out the door and down the stairs despite the fact that these bottoms are too short for his long legs.

As soon as he gets to the lower floor, he hears the incessant cussing of someone who seems to be annoyed at his own lack of skills in the kitchen. When Seungmin peeks inside the room, he’s not surprised to see the silhouette of Han Jisung in what seems to be an apron. There’s smoke heavily spiraling up from the pan he has in his hand, placing the pan right under the exhaust vent. Seungmin wonders if he should go and help.

“Get a hold of yourself, Han Jisung,” he seethes as lets the smoke simmer up into the vent. “Cooking pancakes is not that hard.” 

“It's really not,” Seungmin agrees loudly.

Jisung lets out a not-so-manly shriek. In his state of obvious shock, the older boy had completely abandoned what he was doing and immediately went on defense mode. As such, he now has both hands on the handle of the pan, gripping it like how one would a baseball bat. The remains of what Seungmin assumed was a burnt pancake is currently lying bent in half on the floor.

“Whoa, easy there. I didn’t mean to scare you,” Seungmin says softly, hands in the air as he leans back in casual fright.

“Whether you meant it or not, you scared me,” Jisung breathes out, slowly bringing the pan back to the stove now that what he thought was danger was simply a rumpled-looking Kim Seungmin. “Anyway, you’re awake! I thought for sure you wouldn’t wake up until well into the afternoon, but I stand corrected.”

“What can I say, my internal clock just refuses to let me sleep for too long,” Seungmin shrugs as he approaches Jisung and picks up the pancake on the floor. He immediately feels the funny disorientation as soon as he stands back up, but he endures it. “Pancakes, I see. Shall I whip us up some perfect fluff?”

“You know how to cook?” Jisung asks incredulously, and Seungmin would feel offended if he still wasn’t so scatterbrained.

“I’m sort of a master at cooking pancakes,” Seungmin scoffs.

Ten minutes after, Seungmin was, in fact, close to master level. Jisung had hovered around as Seungmin tried his best with the ingredients that he got. Seungmin and Felix had made too many pancakes in their lifetime for Seungmin not to learn from his mistakes. As such, he didn’t use too much butter as Felix was wont to do in their culinary endeavors. Additionally, he didn’t whisk the batter on the pan as he would to an egg. Seungmin remembers Felix’s wide eyes when he saw Seungmin do that for the first time. And Seungmin now knew just the right amount of golden brown that made the pancakes crunchy on the outside yet fluffy on the inside. Jisung had watched with nonchalance, but Seungmin knew better if the sparkles in the older boy’s eyes were anything to go by.

Jisung sets up their plates and utensils as well as cups of coffee after Seungmin did the finishing touches.

“You really outdid my expectations of you this time,” Jisung teases.

Seungmin rolls his eyes. “Well, your crispy, burnt-flavored pancakes were right up my expectations for you. But try mine and tell me what you think.”

Seungmin finishes with a smile. Jisung analyzes the food in silence.

“What?” Seungmin says when Jisung looks up at him. “I didn’t poison it, I swear.”

Jisung takes the fork and cuts off a piece of the pancake. It’s decorated with whipped cream and fresh pieces of strawberries. Closing his eyes, he takes a big bite of it. Instantly, his eyes widen as he’s bewitched by the flavor, Seungmin presumes.

“Oh my god, these are amazing,” Jisung comments through a mouthful. “Where’d you learn how to cook pancakes like this?”

“Felix and I record some videos from time to time. Making pancakes was one of them,” Seungmin explains. “I’m glad you like them. Consider it as a token of gratitude for taking care of me last night. I don’t really remember what happened, but seeing as I’m in your apartment, I suppose nothing too horrible occurred, right?”

“Oh,” Jisung’s brows turn in. “You don’t remember anything at all?”

“I remember drinking a lot,” Seungmin says as he takes a forkful of pancake, strawberry, and whipped cream. “I think the last thing I remember is ranting to Hyunjin and talking to you before your friend interrupted us.”

“Minho?”

“I think so. Last night was such a blur. It was a mistake,” Seungmin chews a little roughly. “What are you guys anyway?”

Jisung turns to him with a slightly hurt expression. “I see. What do you mean? Like… what’s our relationship?”

Seungmin nods without looking up from his food.

“We’re childhood friends, I told you,” Jisung answers defensively. “Is there any particular reason why you’re so interested in the depth of my friendship with him?”

Seungmin bites his lip. “No particular reason.”

They eat quietly, with random small points of conversation that has Seungmin zoning out a lot. Without the alcohol, it seems neither of them want to approach the topic that they had laid out last night before Minho came into the picture. The defensive way Jisung answered has Seungmin assuming that there’s must be something more to that but doesn’t want to ask. Because if he does, Seungmin and Jisung would be treading close to the feelings territory, and Seungmin isn’t sure he’s quite ready for that talk.

There are a couple of things that Seungmin isn’t ready for. That’s one of them. Another is stopping this little friendship they’ve found in their time together. Without the notion of audition day, they have no end goal to work towards. They have no reason to spend time together. It’s this thought that has Seungmin wanting to stay in Jisung’s place for a bit more.

When Seungmin has to leave goodbye, they give each other a nice hug. It’s the longest contact they’ve had without a reason other than companionship.

“Bye,” Jisung says tonelessly.

“Bye,” Seungmin waves before turning around and walking away. He feels Jisung’s stare all the way until he reaches the end of the hall and presses the button for the elevator. So this is how it feels to be on the receiving end of a long stare.

Somehow, this interaction has an ending that’s much bigger than just saying bye. 

When Seungmin and his friends go out for dinner, they immediately bombard Seungmin with questions.

“What did you and Jisung do after the party?”

“Did you and Jisung finally have the talk?”

“Are you guys together?”

Seungmin immediately feels claustrophobic.

“What are you guys on about?” Seungmin asks, mixing the jjajangmyeon with his metal chopsticks. “Jisung and I didn’t do anything.”

“Wait, why not?” Hyunjin asks.

“Why would Jisung and I do anything?”

“Well, you guys were hugging at the corner of the party last night,” Felix reasons, blowing at his soup to cool it down a bit. “You were crying too.”

Seungmin doesn’t remember this.

“And you had your face tucked into Jisung’s neck, and everything” Jeongin adds before taking a sip of his drink. “So we thought you guys finally talked things out.”

Oh gosh, Seungmin doesn’t remember any of this. He looks between the three of them, looking a little lost and feeling a lot confused. He didn’t expect this onslaught of information, didn’t realize that such an intimate thing happened between him and Jisung last night.

“You don’t remember, do you?” Hyunjin comments. Seungmin shakes his head. Jeongin and Felix and exchange looks before turning back to Seungmin looking sympathetic.

“Have you talked to Jisung about it?” Hyunjin inquires.

“Not really,” Seungmin chews on his lip.

“I think you should really talk to him about it,” Jeongin covers Seungmin’s hand with his own. “I’m sure you guys have a lot to talk about.”

Seungmin nods and they drop the subject. They move onto lighter ones, like their stupid Physics homework.

Just as Seungmin assumed, they don’t really hang out in the next couple of days. Seungmin doesn’t invite Jisung to things, Jisung doesn’t approach Seungmin for anything.

Perhaps it’s best if it was like this. That way, things wouldn’t be so confusing for Seungmin.

***

Seungmin plays with the peas on his lunch plate.

Hyunjin, Felix, and Jeongin are already talking animatedly over each other, topics ranging from something as mundane as Netflix shows to personal stuff like who they think would get what parts in their play.

“To be honest, I think Seungmin would make a wonderful Danny,” Jeongin starts.

“He’s wonderful in general,” Felix adds before looking at Seungmin apologetically. “But I feel like Jisung can pull off a better bad boy vibe than Seungmin, no offense mate.”

“None taken,” Seungmin grits his teeth, annoyed not at the comparison but the fact that the person he’s currently trying not to talk about is brought up.

“Since Jisung makes a great Danny, don’t you guys think that Seungmin would make a fantastic Sandy?”

Felix and Jeongin agree immediately.

They’re not slick at all. Can they stop talking about Jisung? Seungmin would kind of want to not think about anything that has to do with him. It’d be nice if they could just forget he existed for a couple of days.

Just as they say this, Seungmin ignores them and instead focuses his attention on the two boys sitting on the far side of the cafeteria. Seungmin finds that he’s been doing this a lot more than he had lately, his eyes always finding a way to land on Jisung wherever they may be.

In class, with Seungmin subtly looking back from where he’s usually sat. In the hallways in between classes when they use their lockers, with Seungmin standing on tippy toes just to catch a glimpse of Jisung’s messy hair. Once or twice or five times, they make eye contact, but Seungmin is always the first to look away.

It’s as if Jisung has a sixth sense for Seungmin’s stares because it only takes a couple of seconds of looking before Jisung glances back. Even now, across the cafeteria with tons of people between them, Seungmin and Jisung make eye contact. And as usual, Seungmin is the first to look away.

It feels so different. Seungmin and Jisung had spent so much of their time together in the last three or so weeks that not really talking in public feels unnatural. Funny how everything can change in just a span of weeks. Though if Seungmin’s being honest, it really only took ten days to warm up to Jisung. Sighing, he tries not to think about it.

Instead he focuses back on the topic with his friends. They’ve moved on to a drama that Hyunjin is passionately talking about. Extraordinary You or something like that. Seungmin just nods along and smiles.

It’s when the roles are revealed that Seungmin and Jisung finally get the chance to talk again. Lunch has just begun, just as Mr. Park mentioned, the cast list for their Grease production is pinned just right outside the auditorium.

“Do you want to check it together?” Jeongin asks with a bright smile on his face. Jeongin really is the personification of angel.

Seungmin nods.

The walk to the auditorium is filled with small talk and nervous energy. Seungmin couldn’t help but feel tingly all over, not necessarily from the eagerness of wanting to know if he got the male lead. Though he supposes that’s part of it. A strong part of him doesn’t want to know because knowing meant that all of the last few weeks would come to a meaningful end. And he’s not quite sure he’s ready for that to fully happen yet.

“Are you alright, Seungmin?” Jeongin inquires, eyes downturned as he watched Seungmin with concern. “You’ve barely spoken on the way here.”

Seungmin chuckles. “I think I’m just excited to finally know, I guess.” He shrugs.

Jeongin smiles at him and replies, “I’m sure you landed the male lead. If not, then probably one of the bigger ones.”

“If I don’t get the lead, I’ll only be satisfied if I lost it to you,” Seungmin nudges Jeongin.

The younger boy rubs his neck as he stares at the ground. “My performance was sub-par.”

“That’s a lie and you know it. I know you know you did great, and that’s not something you need to be modest about. Sometimes, a performer must know how to sell himself to be successful.”

Jeongin gives him a grateful smile.

“You deserve it as much as any of us, honest,” Seungmin declares, crossing his heart. “As long as it isn’t Han Jisung, I’m good with it.”

Jeongin laughs and takes him by the arm as they make the last few steps to the auditorium door. Seungmin doesn’t mention that the sentence feels foreign in his mouth, as if they were words uttered by a person he didn't know. They stop at the wall right next to it, in front of a bulletin board with the cast list pinned at the center.

Seungmin scans the page, starting with the big, bold letters at the top that says “Cast List.”

Jeongin must have read it before Seungmin had because he gasps first before looking at Seungmin with wide eyes. 

“Seungmin.”

Seungmin bites his lips, hearing the crowd of students suddenly filter in to also check the roles they got. He elbows his way out of the group before Jeongin can catch him and Seungmin makes his way towards the closest men’s bathroom in the vicinity.

He doesn’t know why he starts crying softly as soon he enters a stall, but he does. He supposes it’s a mixture of seeing the cast list and his undeniable feelings for Jisung. He lets his tears out, satisfied in finally letting out all the pent up emotion and confusion that’s been building up inside him for weeks now. Seeing the roles was simply the icing on top of the cake.

Seungmin hears the bathroom door open and tries to hold in his breath. His face feels like a hot mess. He sniffles a little, hoping the sound isn’t loud enough to hear by whoever just came in. It’s kind of hard to stop breathing though, when all he wants to do is cry about his stupid feelings and scream at the same time.

“Seungmin?” A voice says. Seungmin hates how he can identify the voice as Jisung just from the way he puts his tonation in his words, both light and nasal at the same time. “I know you’re in there.”

Seungmin scoffs. That’s a lie. How can Jisung know that Seungmin is inside one of the stalls for sure?

“I can tell by the way you sniffle.”

Which, what? Seungmin examines the way he sniffles and doesn’t think it’s any different from how any other human being sniffles, so what is Jisung going on about?

“You do this little thing where you do a big sniffle before doing small one right after,” Jisung explains, walking closer to Seungmin’s stall. Seungmin can almost see Jisung shake his head as he says it. “And also I saw you dash into the men’s bathroom, so, I’m pretty sure you’re in there.”

Typical, Seungmin thinks. He doesn’t reply though, unsure whether he wants Jisung here or tell him to leave. He doesn’t exactly want his crush to see him so undone at the moment, but at the same time, his mind and body is yearning to be close to him and see him right in front of his eyes.

“Unless you have the power of teleportation that you never told me about, in which case I’m talking at somebody else on the other side of this stall and sounding really stupid.”

He thinks perhaps it’s better if he talks to Jisung properly at another time, when he’s nice and ready and doesn’t look like he’s two seconds away from another breakdown.

“This isn’t Seungmin,” Seungmin tries to say in the least Seungmin way possible, but it doesn’t sound like he sounded very convincing considering the way Jisung is cackling on the other side.

“You can do better than that, sunshine.”

“I’m pooping?” Seungmin immediately facepalms. He’s never been this inarticulate when it comes to his words, always choosing to be on the side of decisive and methodical.

“If you were pooping, I would say it smells nice, but I’m certain that you’re probably just sitting down on the toilet,” Jisung declares, standing right in front of the stall now. Seungmin can see how the other boy’s feet are facing away from him. Add to that the fact that the stall door made a rattling noise, Seungmin assumes that Jisung is leaning with his back against the stall door.

How does Jisung know that Seungmin isn’t actually pooping though?

“Because if you were, your pants would be pooling around your ankles, but I didn’t see that under the stall when I walked in.”

Seungmin sighs.

“Stupid, stupid,” he whispers to himself. Jisung is much too perceptive for his own good. Seungmin just knows it’ll be the boy’s downfall in the far future. Jisung makes a huffing noise outside.

“Don’t call yourself stupid, that’s too demeaning,” Jisung says lightly. “Why don’t you just come out so we can have a proper conversation, yeah? Much better than speaking into the air like this.”

“What are you doing here, Jisung?” Seungmin asks softly. “What do you want to talk about?”

Jisung stays silent for a while, and Seungmin thinks that whatever the reason may be, he appreciates Jisung for coming here all the same.

“I saw you read the roster,” Jisung says after moments of quiet. “I know you saw who got the male lead.”

Seungmin approaches the door and has half a mind to unlock it. Instead, he turns around and leans back on the door as well so that they’re mirrors of each other.

They stay there in silence for a while, letting the atmosphere surround them in a private bubble. Even though there’s only a thin layer of stall door between them, Seungmin feels the distance growing at this very moment. He also realizes that anything feels better than the quiet.

“You know, I thought you’d be a shit person to work with,” Jisung admits.

“I did too,” Seungmin croaks.

“But honestly, I had a lot of fun working with you.”

Seungmin gulps.

“I did too,” Seungmin replies, hands going around to hug himself. He lets several seconds pass before he adds something else. “I hope we can at least be friends, after all of this.”

“Aren’t we already?” Jisung sighs from the other side.

“Are we?” Seungmin wonders.

“Of course we are. I don’t just offer my earbud to any random person, you know.”

It makes Seungmin snicker. They stew in silence until it feels too unbearable.

“But can you please unlock this door? There’s so much more I need to say,” Jisung asks him. Seungmin feels a thump against the door, as if Jisung bumped his head softly against it in frustration, desperation and defeat. “If it really means that much to you, I’ll drop out or something. I swear I will. I’ll fake an injury so you can have the lead, or I’ll talk to Mr. Park to recast for someone else.”

Seungmin bites his lip and hates the part of himself that considered the offer for that one second. He’s angered both by that part of himself and this selfless part of Jisung that borders on pity, a feeling that Seungmin hates being on the receiving end of.

“Please, just open this door,” Jisung pleads, voice getting lower with each syllable. “Just let me in.”

Seungmin closes his eyes and turns around. The metal of the stall lock feels cool against his fingers as he unlatches it. Immediately, the door pushes him back and in rushes a stumbling Jisung that must have been geared off-balance after Seungmin unlocked the door.

Jisung grunts in pain. Seungmin does too as he catches the older boy. 

“Are you okay?” Seungmin inquires, surveying the boy he’s currently supporting in his arms.

Jisung faces him, looking blotchy-faced and on the verge of tears. 

“You opened the door,” Jisung replies, dismissing Seungmin’s question about his well-being. “I didn’t think you’d open the door.”

Seungmin scoffs as Jisung straightens himself and dusts his clothes presentable. “Why wouldn’t I open the door?”

Jisung shrugs. “I just thought you would sulk there forever, and I was going to have to crawl under the stall door to get you to come out. Thank god I didn’t have to do that, or else I wouldn’t have forgiven you for making me crawl on top of what I’m sure is a dirty, germ-ridden, cum-stained bathroom floor.”

Seungmin makes a face at the mental image his brain produced. “Please, no more talk about germs and… male ejaculate.”

They both chuckle before slowing down to another unusual silence. In the years that they’ve known each other, silence was never something Seungmin considered unusual between them. They were either bickering or ignoring each other. And the silence that came after or before was due to harsh feelings of hatred that, looking back now, seemed petty and immature and plenty unreasonable. Silence was never unusual until they started practicing together and got along surprisingly well.

“I’m sorry that I got the male lead and you didn’t,” Jisung hurries in apology. “I swear, I don’t need it. I don’t want it if you want it. I’ll give it up, I’ll-”

“Don’t,” Seungmin interrupts him with a hand on the shorter boy’s shoulder. “You got the role fair and square. You did better than I did in auditions, and you deserve it. Don’t give it to me because of some misplaced compassion for a newfound friendship that you discovered. I don’t need that pity.”

Jisung looks at him in alarm. “No! No, no, Seungmin. I don’t look at you with pity, never pity. Pity is the last thing that comes to mind when I think of you.”

Seungmin gulps. What comes to his mind then? He thinks to himself. And as if Jisung read his mind, the older boy answers.

“Well, when I looked at you before, I saw someone who got upset quickly, who sulked easily,” Jisung answers, his eyes lighting up with each sentence. And Seungmin has to hold back from flicking him on the forehead and calling him an elf. “I saw someone who used sharp snark and cutting words as a method of attack, something that I found myself on the receiving end of many time. I have to admit that it’s not my favorite thing in the world.”

“Where are you going with this?” Seungmin demands, taking half a step back and crossing his arms. “If you’re trying to make me feel better, your method of doing so is very counterintuitive because I feel worse than I did when you came in.”

“Just listen to the whole thing, sunshine. And don’t interrupt.”

With a sigh, Seungmin nods and hopes whatever happens after this, they come out better when all’s said and done.

“Where was I?”

“You were just graciously telling me how I used my snark and words as a way of attacking you.”

“Right! Anyway, I also saw this alter ego that seemed to be the worst of what I assumed you had the potential to be. You had this mischievous side of you that I both liked and disliked at the same time. I saw this master of sarcasm that was both sure and unsure of himself. But beyond that, after spending some time practicing with you and getting to know you better outside of school, I see now what I couldn’t see before.”

Seungmin furrows his brows, a similar experience of his view of Jisung coming to mind.

“Now when I look at you, I see someone who has both a strong mentality and strong personality,” Jisung admits, eyes not leaving Seungmin’s for a second. “I see the hard work that you put into every little activity that you partake. I see the tremendous effort applied carefully and methodically into our practice sessions. And though you sulk easily, you get over it just as quickly as well. I see how thorough you are with self-care, your motivation being presenting the best version of yourself to everyone, and that’s something I admire very much about you. You’re smart and logical and sharp, but also considerate and hold those close to you in deep regard. I see your passion for music and the stage, and it’s inspiring to say the least.”

Jisung’s eyes flicker down for a quick second. “And when you’re focusing on something, I see the way you purse your lips, and it kind of makes me want to kiss you a little bit.”

Seungmin feels his knees go weak with every sentence. He feels his gut swoop up and down with every admission coming from Jisung’s mouth, but he can’t say that he expected that last one. That last phrase awakens something in Seungmin that he’s tried to fight, tried to keep dormant for fear of being the only one who felt that way. But here Jisung is now, saying exactly the thing that Seungmin himself was too afraid to voice out.

“I hope you see now that it’s not out of pity. I don’t need the male lead role. I don’t want it. You can have it in my place.”

“You idiot, why would you do that?” Seungmin questions him, wanting to hear Jisung say the words that mirror exactly how Seungmin feels. “Don’t do that for me, that’s stupid.”

Jisung steps forward and gulps.

“A certain someone once said to me that feelings make us do stupid things. Well, here I am doing something stupid.”

“If you had made this offer weeks ago, prior to everything that we’ve just been through, I would have thought that you had lost your mind or had been replaced by a Han Jisung look alike,” Seungmin admits, giggling softly as he stepped closer to Jisung. “I would have jumped at the chance in getting the lead role, especially with the condition that you wouldn’t play it. I suppose one could argue that refusing your offer would be a stupid choice.”

Jisung gives him a sad smile.

“But here I am now, doing just that,” Seungmin continues as he grabs Jisung by the hands. “You deserve this role as much as I do. You practiced with the same amount of eagerness to do well. We put in the same amount of effort, and Mr. Park obviously made the right decision in giving it to you. So no, no I don’t think I will. I refuse to accept what you’re offering. I don’t need this role to define me who I know I am and who I know I want to be.”

Jisung swallows, and Seungmin’s eyes focus on the way Jisung’s throat moves before going up to trace the outline of the older boy’s lips.

“But after all of that, what I do need is your mouth against mine,” Seungmin licks his lips. “I’ve been wondering how-”

Jisung surges forward and Seungmin catches Jisung’s lips with his. Finally, Seungmin says to himself. Finally, he gets to taste Jisung’s lips. They’re incredibly soft, and Seungmin likes how nicely their lips fit against each other. Seungmin finds that Jisung tastes a little bit of oranges and flesh. Jisung finds out that Seungmin tastes like banana, mint, and a little bit like saliva.

The older boy snakes his arms around Seungmin’s neck as Seungmin wraps one of his arms around Jisung’s back. He uses his free hand to feel for the stall door to close it and push Jisung against it.

The older boy gasps as his back hits the sturdy door, and Seungmin uses that to his advantage to dive into Jisung’s neck. He considers putting a love bite there, but he figures they’re probably not quite at that stage yet. Heck, are they even at the stage where they should be making out in semi-public? Or even making out at all?

“Seungmin, I don’t think we should do this here,” Jisung manages in between heavy breaths. “What if someone comes in?”

Seungmin ignores him for a bit, working selfishly against Jisung’s soft skin. Seungmin can’t decide which one he likes better between Jisung’s neck and Jisung’s lips. Perhaps, he needs to taste Jisung’s mouth again to find out the answer.

Seungmin pulls back and says, “I’ve been wanting to do this for so long, waiting for it. Tell me you haven’t been wanting this, and I’ll stop right now and we can go somewhere more private.”

Jisung stares at him, breath evidently heavy from the atmosphere surrounding them. His pupils are blown black and wide and Seungmin counts to three in his head before Jisung agrees.

“I want this.”

“And you don’t want Minho?” Seungmin asks because he just wants to make sure.

“No, Minho is the last thing on my mind right now. Maybe I wanted him in the past, years ago. But I don’t want him now, haven’t for a long time. It’s you, Seungmin. I want you.”

This time it’s Seungmin who goes forward and kisses him, his lips massaging Jisung’s as he places one of his legs in between Jisung’s for better support, comfort, and of course pleasure. Jisung grabs Seungmin’s hair and back and pulls him closer as he presses himself forward, and Seungmin can’t help but shiver at how tantalizingly good it feels to be flush and warm against Jisung.

Just as Seungmin is about to stick his tongue inside, the bathroom door creaks open and Jeongin’s voice echoes against the tiled walls.

“Seungmin, are you here? Are you ok- oh my god. I’m so sorry.”

Seungmin and Jisung snap apart quickly, looking at each other baffled by the sudden intrusion of Jeongin’s voice and the immediate withdrawal of it.

“You reckon he saw the two pairs of feet under the stalls?” Seungmin asks.

“Positive.”

“Well, do you want to keep on kissing anyway?”

Jisung snickers. “Positive.”

The next couple of days during lunch and theater practice, places where Jisung and Seungmin went to while holding hands, everyone was surprisingly unsurprised about the slight change of events.

“Are my eyes deceiving me?” Changbin had blurted out when he saw the two of them walking to their first class with their hands entwined. “I can’t believe you guys finally had the guts to put your immaturity aside long enough to tell each other your feelings.”

Suffice it to say that he got two sharp mouths to wound him that morning.

“About time,” Felix had said when he joined Seungmin and Jisung for lunch, hands coming up together in a devious manner. “First arc of the Seungsung agenda, check. Second step? World domination.”

“Well, Seungmin _is_ my world, so I suppose I could do that,” Jisung replies with a smirk.

Seungmin quickly snatches his hand away with a hiss and Felix makes a retching noise.

“That was so bad,” Seungmin shakes his head.

“So bad it was good, right?” Jisung leans over and motions at Seungmin’s fingers with grabby hands. “Come back, my hands are cold.”

“Y’all are cute,” Jeongin had added when he came too with Hyunjin in tow.

“I take it you went ahead and went with my advice?” Hyunjin asks with a smile.

“Yes and no,” Seungmin answers, flushing at the memory of him tipsily talking to Hyunjin about his crush and his crush’s childhood friend. Yikes.

“Well, glad it went well anyway.”

When Changbin joins them, the table feels fuller than ever. But it’s not crowded, rather it feels complete. When Jisung leans in to give Seungmin a kiss on the cheek, their four friends had protested saying _no, no, none of that_ and making gagging noises.

Seungmin’s eyes catches Jisung’s, and they think of the same idea at the same time. Seungmin giggles and Jisung joins him before they meet each other halfway again, this time catching each other softly on the lips. 

Seungmin would like to add that love can sound like hate. Hate is not the opposite of love, but rather, indifference is. When two enemies start to feel things, it creates a fixation and sparks funny things like ranting and arguing. This is exactly the story of Seungmin and Jisung. And while Seungmin didn’t land the male lead in the school play, he did get a male lead of his own in the form of Han Jisung. And honestly, Seungmin would happily take that any time.

**Author's Note:**

> Ah, you made it to the end!
> 
> Thank you for making it this far. I wish I had more time to work on this, but I was really busy due to college and finals. There are some parts that most definitely seem rushed, I am sorry. I'm bad at time management lmao.
> 
> I hope you liked this @thenationsrapper !!!
> 
> Hey everyone! I really appreciate kudos and comments, so please leave some! :D Seungsung ftw!
> 
> Happy Holidays!


End file.
